すみませんが、いまはこの記事が日本語で不可能選択です。

Annoy Cops By Petting Cats

投稿されました:

This morning I dreamed that I stood beside a road that ran along a ridge.  There were four steel support columns being built around the road, presumably for a sign welcoming visiters to the city.  I asked a passerby if he thought the road was going to be too narrow because of the positioning of the structure being built.  He invited me to following him up a short climb above the road so that we could get a better view of the scene.  We discussed the structure very briefly at our elevated location, then I offered to give him a lift in my automobile which then found itself nearby.

We were then standing in the back of a large GMC van that only had the two front seats installed.  Without sitting at the wheel, my passenger somehow started the van, put it into gear, and started it down the steep face of the ridge.  I had trouble stopping the van because the empty driver seat had been pushed all the way forward against the steering wheel, but I managed to get my foot on the brake and stop the van right after leveling out in a residential area and right as a few police cars pulled in front of us.

We got out of the van, and a policeman started lecturing us about reckless driving.  He then made us watch on a tablet a short safety film that depicted people being killed in traffic accidents.  After the film, a cat showed up nearby, so the policeman said to my passenger something like, “If you'd hit that cat, it wouldn't be showing up in anybody's kitchen any more!”

The policeman then held out a bag of folded papers for me to pick one out.  I selected one and unfolded it to find printed upon it, “Muck out [some machine].”  I was being made to choose my own punishment by luck of the draw.  (Also in the bag were dollar store washclothes, as if I might “win” one of those instead of a punishment.)  The policeman didn't think my punishment was harsh enough, so while he discussed with another cop what my punishment should be, I thought it might annoy him if I pet the cat during his lecture.  As soon as I called, “Here, kitty, kitty!” dozens of cats showed up, including my true-life farm cats.

The cops looked annoyed, and then I woke up.